VICTORY IN BROKENNESS..

Wow! itong blog kong 'to e parang isang creepy old house na..sort of like the old church na pinuntahan namen nung mission trip..grabe..andami ko nang na-miss na ilagay dito!

Iisa-isahin ko ba talaga?! ok ok..

Isa-summarize ko na lang yung about sa school..haaaaaaayyy!! grabe! naging sobrang madugo..as in.. dun ko na-realize na hindi na talaga uubra yung mga pasta-stock knowledge..if you wanna pass, PRACTICE! That's the way to survive sa engineering, kung inde kopyahan..and I'm proud to say na inde ako nangongopya..sa exams..sa assignment..it depends..hehe..may sabit e no..hehe..

bakit naging madugo, you ask? lemme tell you..

EE201 muna..yan.. wow..subject sa major namen! cool! finally! we're taking up subjects related to our course! aba aba..inde pala madali..sa simula..kung inde ka talaga magpa-practice, you're bound to fail.. e kung banatan ka ba naman ng 13/100 at 15/100 para sa first two quizzes mo e..tingnan naten kung good to go ka pa rin..

MATH112: wow! madali lang pala e..! tapos sa quiz..30/100..practice really makes perfect..or nearly perfect..hehe..sa exams..aba..anyabang ko e, ano?! inde ako naga-aral palibhasa naiintindihan ko..ayan..muntik na din lumaglag..sabi nga ng prof e: "Eto, hindi mahirap-matrabaho.." at yon ang pinatunayan namen..thank the LORD at sa final exam e talagang arangkada ang utak..

MATH208 (i think): ayan..Differential Equations..tagugz! reinforcements! reinforcements! talaga nga naman na mag-aaral ka ulet ng Integral Calculus ulet..at Differential Equations..parang lahat e aaralin ulet! waw..grabe..buti nlng at "kilala" ako ng prof kong matindi..hehe..

sa lahat ng 'to..by His grace alone..i passed..it really is something else kapag iginagapang mo kay LORD..sabi nga ni kuya aaron saken e..sa college, dun na ituturo ni LORD na you have to really depend everything on Him.. inde na pwede yung pa-easy easy..if you wanna pass..PRAY and practice..that's Engineering..sa isang Kristiyano..

ok! off we go to da MISSION TRIP PART! eto ang matinding kwento..mahaba..masaya..exciting..! yiy!

nang malaman ko yung grades ko during the examination week, talaga namang "SHOUT FOR JOY!" HE IS FAITHFUL!!!!!! ON TO MISSION TRIP!!!!!! WOOOOOHHHH!!!

ok ok..composure..so came the week for the mission trip..busy-busyhan ako for the wires, equipment and the like..kung anu-anong mga gamit e inaayos na..gawa ng checklist so as not to forget anything bago umalis..ayan..ok..so far so good..we left at about 9:30pm nung October 24..para ang dating namen dun e Morning of October 25..and so..off we went..yun yung mga tipo ng biyahe na gusto ko e..yung mga 10 hours or 12 hours..best of Yoyong, yoyoy at steven segal..alabama..wahahaha..kulet nyang mga yan..talaga namang tutulugan mo na lang lahat e..buti na lang masarap matulog..

nang makalapag kame..ayon..sinundo kami at ihinatid dun sa bahay na tutuluyan namen..at aba! akalain mo..! mas malayo ng onti as compared dun sa dating tinuluyan namen..! oh no..mahaba-habang lakaran ito papunta sa Prayer Hill..mainit..mabibigat na gamit..yikes! challenge 'to!

practice muna kame for the first few hours..just to get things going..tapos nung bandang tanghali..i went back to the house to eat sana..kaso..kararating pa lang ni ate Dada, one of our cooks, from the palengke..so ok..hintay ulet..for the meantime..akyat kami ni Kuya Jay dun sa prayer hill para mai-organize ko na yung mga gamit..yan ang isa sa mga naging trabaho ko..hehe..technical person talaga e..from PA, projector, speakers and the like..it was my job to place them in the proper places..and indeed..mahirap din pala..pero siguro after 30 minutes of looking around and thinking..na-settle na rin namin..at bumaba kami for a well deserved lunch..we started yung 1st session quite late..why? because..nag set-up pa ulet..chaka nilipad ang malaking trapal na bubong namen..ganung kalakas yung hangin..grabe..buti inde ako nilipad..hehe..jowk.. so ayon.. ako ang worship leader ng 1st session..waw..it was my honor and responsibility..ok..mala Youth Aflame ito! Ako naggigitara..si kuya aaron naman e nag-piano..tapos percussion sila kim at kuya pj, i think..so ayun..xmpre mejo mabigat..kasi kick-off session..pero it's by His grace naman..si Ptr. Joe ang nag-speak..and true enough..iba ang naging message niya.. napunta sa salvation and recommitment..o diba..1st session..iba na agad..and then break muna..for dinner..practices ng onti..and then, akyat na kame ulet..xempre refresh muna..ligu-ligo..unahan sa banyo..nyaks..buti na lang mejo mabilis kame..5 minutes..hehe..

Evening session..game muna, courtesy of kuya PJ..hehe..master showman e..ganun talaga..pagkatapos nun..presentations..variety siyempre..ang naging challenge lang e since 2nd time na namen dun sa tumauini..dami ng presentations na inde na pwedeng gamitin..so synergize/collaborate kame.. and by His grace..nagkaroon ng response sa mga kabataan..we thank the LORD sa nangyari that night..it was such an experience..

the next morning..aga ko nagising! akyat ako dun sa hilltop kung saan kame nagpractice nung 1st day..may mga sementadong kubo dun..ayon..kanta..devotion.."....I offer devotion...." ayan..may kanta pa..hehe..pero it really is a great place to meet with the LORD..kita ang magandang view..masarap ang simoy ng hangin..perfect place for senti nga e..hehe..pero that's another story..basta ayon..talagang meeting with God doon is such an experience..sooobra..baket..kasi..may sort of prophecy si Ptr. Joe nun..since 5 kami, 4 kaming guys na kasama niya..and in that prophecy e meron daw samen missionary, pastor, evangelist, and apostle..i'm not quite sure jan sa apat na yan..but i think yan nga yun..so mejo nakikinikinita na naming apat..hehe..ano kaya ako? hehe..

ayon..we ended up as 5 people na bumaba after that devotion..may mga kasunod pala ako..hehe..ayon..Corporate devotion was led by kuya, este, Ptr. Mike..tapos..breakfast..ligo..akyat sa Prayer Hill..hehe..games muna..and then worship time..session was led by kuya Aaron..at talaga nga naman..project ang boses..powerful message..and then..break into groups..fortunately, si ate imee ay co-leader ako..*whew* i'm safe! haha..jowk..ayon..siya yung nagpaunang-share..and then after we prayed, i testified..siyempre life experience..ok naman ang kinalabasan..glory to God..and then before we went down for the lunch break, aba..may in-between session activity pala..it's either workshop, nood ng film, or something..at pinili nila ang nood ng film..Spirit..ung kabayo..basta ayon..at ang maswerteng pinaakyat nila para mag-setup ng mga yon ay..*drum roll* AKO! aba talaga nga naman..by public demand pa daw e..nakow! wahahaha..pero ok lang..it really is my job naman..kahit wala ako sa presentations..huhu.. hehehehe..pero ayon..after eating..akyat ako at about 1:20pm..set uo..and then baba ulet..i just watched them practice..kasi inde na ako pwedeng sumingit..after some 30 minutes..i thought..akyat na ulet ako..baka natapos na ung unang disc..and indeed..tapos na nga..naunahan ako..so salpak ng 2nd disc..after quite an areglo with the equipment..dahil pinatay nila bigla ang power..so..SOP ako..maayos at organized na pag-on ng equipment..and near the end of the 2nd disc..talaga nga naman o..biglang buhos ang ulan.. so ligpit ako ulet ng gamit as fast as possible..grabe..from the laptop, projector, down to the instruments..tago agad namen..para inde masira..buti na lang mabilis kami kumilos, thank God..hehe..oh yeah..just so you know.. ako lang yung andun na kasama sa YR Team..so lahat sila nasa bahay..mejo matagal din ung ulan, so we had to adjust the time again..at nilipat pa namin ung mga gamit sa kabilang hill..sa music bar..buti na lang mas malapit yun sa bahay..although naging matrabaho pa rin..at siyempre, we had to follow my setup..kaya kelangan andun ako..nagtututuro at nagbububuhat..siyempre with "please" naman ang pananalita ko..ayoko maging mayabang na palibhasa saken naka-base yun e feeling mataas na ako..masaya din ako, bagamat pagod, kasi they understood na ako yung nag-aayos nun..it was very humbling sa amin na i submitted to them, as they did to me..fuzzy feeling?! siguro..haha..

ayon..after nun..akyat na ulet ang team..talagang worship kami nun..and indeed there was the spark of revival..! ang ganda nung sight na nagtatalunan at nagwo-worship sila..siyempre nakakapagod nga lang dahil dere-derecho kaming mga instrumentalists..muntik pa ata mabingi yung right ear ko dahil katabi ko yung cymbals..at pagkalakas-lakas pumalo ni..dadadan! kuya PJ! after nun..there was a slight ringing in my ear..buti na lang inde ako nabingi..hehe..the next session was supposed to start bandang 8:15pm..pero na-move yun kasi nagpractice pa ulit sila..pagkatapos kumain e naligo agad ako, and knowing na wala naman ako part dun..akyat agad ako..at about 8:20pm, andun na ako..making some preparations..at siyempre..hinintay ko sila na umakyat at about 8:45pm..we started the presentations..the LORD's anointing was with us kaya naging maganda naman ang presentations..and then, worship ulit..that was how we ended the night..ay hindi pala! we ended the night with pikchur-pikchuran! haha.."kimchi!" (tawag sa peace sign pag pikchuran..hehe..)

saturday, October 29..as usual..devotion..pero this devotion of mine was quite different..sure i had my Bible, my mug of milo+coffee and my guitar..pero iba ang naging move sa akin ni LORD..si Ptr. Joe lang ang kasama ko that time..pero His presence was just all over me..i was crying while worshiping the LORD..tumutugtog lang and the songs just kept coming..i cried my heart out to Him..tapos nun..prayer walk kami ni ptr. Joe..that was when we saw that certain spot na talagang ang ganda nung view..it was such a marvelous sight to behold..and then..baba na ulet kami..

we didn't have our corporate devotion na that time kasi namalengke si ptr. joe..i think..kaya ayun..prepare, prepare kami..some of us nga e inde na naligo..akyat agad..haha..yuck..nyahahaha..e kelangan na namen umakyat e..chaka fun day naman nun..kaya ok lng..at least..isang liguan na lang to wash off lahat ng dumi na kakapit samen after the games..cheering siyempre inde mawawala yan..*tenench tenench! here we go! tenench tenench! ISAIAH!* yan ung simula nung samen..sounds family..wahaha!

tapos games na! courtesy of Ptr. Mike..sadly e inde kami nanalo..pero it's ok..masaya naman e! tapos yung last game e treasure hunt..supposedly e 30 minutes..pero antagal namen maka pick up..! haha..kaya napahaba..pero nung may nanalo na..ayun..it was time to award everyone..after nun e yung tribute video na ginawa ni kuya aaron..and then we broke into groups ulet..we prayed and blessed them and gave them the tokens..siyempre..yung aken..*ehem ehem* bentang benta..sa YR Team..! sila ang pumakyaw! hindi yung members namen! ano ba yan..haha! tapos ayun..may message lang si Ptra. Oss sandali..after nun..kain kami..pikchuran ulet! and then..baba na ulet kami..kasi we had to practice for the presentations na gagawin namen sa Lapogan-baby church ng YMA..so mejo malayo yun..pero ok lang..the LORD was the one who moved from the presentations down to the worship time, led by ate Melo..we started quite late kasi ayun nga..we had to prepare the place ulet..pero we came home exhausted, but victorious..Glory to God!

Last day! Sunday! we broke up into groups..4 groups actually..siyempre dun ako sa main..kasama ko si Ptra. Oss, kuya Jay, kuya EfEf, at si Joy A..it was quite the breaking sa akin..breaking ni LORD na talaga nga namang extreme! walang mic stand..nasisintunado ang gitara kahit itono..ang overhead e mejo magulo..katabi ko ang cymbals, ULET, dahil maiksi ang wire..paos ako dahil siguro sa hamog at dahil nabanat ang vocal cords dun sa presentation the past night..so hirap iproject ng boses hanggang likod..mejo mataas ang tono nung gitara..kaya nasa bingit ng pag piyok..but still..it was His grace that brought us through..and indeed e nagbago ang message ni Ptra. Oss..talaga nga naman e no..and then the altar call..imagine almost 20 people who responded..mag-isa lang siya na magpe-pray para sa kanila..so 2 lang ang naipag-pray ni Ta Oss tpos corporate prayer na lang..at matapos nun e biglang may bumagsak na matanda..napuspos siguro..buti nlng nasalo ni Ta Oss..ayan..diba..ibang klase..pero maganda naman ang nangyari..kaya ayon..after the service..nakatikim kami ng Pansit Tumauini! aba ibang klase..kakaibang pansit..kaya ayan..kain kame! after that..dahil hinihintay pa namen yung ibang groups dun s church..laboy muna kami!!!! wuuuuuttt!!!

pinuntahan namin yung lumang catholic church..astig..! soooobra..nagpikchuran kami dun.. hehehe..we were very very very very fortunate na makita yun..siyempre hindi dahil sa catholic church..pero dahil out of 21 members ng YR team..4 lang kami na nakapunta at nakakita nun..yung loob, siyempre..so ako, si kuya jay, kuya efef, at si joy a.. tuwang tuwa ko kasi it's quite the experience..inakyat namen yung mga bells nung church..kaso bawal patunugin e..hehe..sunod lng kami..puro kimchi pix kame! hahaha..so enjoyable! tapos pag uwi namin..andun na ung iba..hintay pa ng onti..kain ng suha..and then we went home..the other guys e naglaro ng basketball..inde na ako sumama kasi wala din naman ako gagawin..and i don't play basketball kasi..hehe..stay kami dun..bonding kuno..pero puro pikchuran lang naman talaga..until the others arrived..mejo napa-rush pa kami dahil sa schedule nung bus..rush kain at rush ayos kami..anlamig pa sa bus nun..soooobra..just ask the others..hahaha..

overall..the Mission Trip was a blast..! we had our side trips din siyempre..inde ko na naisama yung side trip naming 8 boys..hehe..ngayon ko lang naisama..after yun nung saturday..nung nagliligpitan na..ayun..we took "the shortcut.." pikchuran galore! wahahaha..

ayon nga..i personally enjoyed that mission trip..it was really something else..it may have been the same place..but it definitely wasn't the same thing that happened..the LORD moves in mysterious ways..all we can do is follow..as the title of this post says..VICTORY IN BROKENNESS..i was really broken..mula sa school hanggang sa mission trip..i learned talaga na unless we are broken..we cannot be molded anew..we have to understand that brokenness is something we must not despise..in brokenness we are made whole..we have to really surrender to the LORD everything if we truly desire to be broken..as glass is broken and melted in the fire..we have to be the same..we have to be as a glass vessel that is broken and melted in the fire of God so that we can be molded into a finer vessel..as we go through this process, we are continually being refined into the perfect vessel that we are meant to be..Glory to God!

Brokenness is very painful..i know..i've been through it..and i'm sure you have been as well..if not..then..it'll come in His time..sa totoo lang..hanggang sa ngayon..as i type, i feel that brokenness inside..another part of me is being broken..it truly hurts..because it removes the bad part of our lives-the parts that we do not want touched..the bad parts that we got used to..those things that feel right but are really wrong..even with the pain and suffering that i have to endure and must endure..i do believe that one day..i will be one of those perfect vessels..those vessels that have endured the fires of testing and the times of brokenness..those vessels that have stood the test of time and have been perfected, fit for the Master's use..Hallelujah!

As we are being broken, whether it be in the spiritual or in the natural, let us learn that "If the LORD delights in a man's way, He makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with His hand.." Psalm 37:23-24..This was and still is His word for me as I went through the 1st semester until the mission trip..may it be a blessing and encouragement..God Bless You, Reader..